Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
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