I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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