wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
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