i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
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