Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
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