plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
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