I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
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