Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Randomize