i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Randomize