Thanks for jumping on that grenade for me last night. You're the best wingman ever
She ate 7 of the 8 slices of pizza. I deserve a purple heart and sex w your sister
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Randomize