only if we run a train.
done.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
You took a bar mat shot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
Is Oprah even human
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
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