and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
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You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
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I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
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