What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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