Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
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So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
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He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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