Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
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