I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
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