oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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