What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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