i jhust puked up my retainher.
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
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