why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
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I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
where are you?
Hypothermia
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Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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