im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day ππ#pensacolaproblems
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
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