You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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