it's too hot outside to masturbate.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
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she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
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he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
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