Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize