He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
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