Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
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