I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
Randomize