I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Randomize