My boss' voice literally gives me gas
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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