I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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