i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize