My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
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Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
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My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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