This girl is more easily done than said...
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
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