Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Randomize