apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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