where does the pee come out of this thing
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
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