I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize