My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize