remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
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