i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Randomize