Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Boobs speak an international language.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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