she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
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