I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
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