there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Randomize