THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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