Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
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