Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
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