didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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