my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
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