I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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